Rhandom Schittshowe Cancer Journey: 2024-04-03: Told my Mom (and Facebook)

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Type Name Description Service Provider Cost Kms To Date Total Notes
OtherTold my Mom$0.000
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I told a couple of friends when I was diagnosed, but other than that I was keeping it tight until I could tell my mom in-person. I didn't want to tell her over the phone or on video. We had some shite weather that kept Brent and me from driving to Red Deer, so the waiting was longer than I had hoped. Telling my mom was harder than getting my diagnosis. Ugh. But, once Mom knew, then I started posting on Facebook.


I'm coping largely with inappropriate humor. One of my favorite things to do is dream up \"alternative prosthetics\" that I'm going to get in place of my boobs. Here are some favorite ideas:\n
- Bicycle repair tools on retraction chains. \n
- Beer taps (would require a backpack with two bladders to hold different types of beer). \n
- Laser pointers (to play with cats). \n
- “Bang” flag guns\n
- Tasers (to protect from robbers)


Facebook Post:\n
There's no good time, and no easy way to drop bad news, so I'm just going to \"out with it\". \n

On March 14, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. On May 1 I will be having a double mastectomy with aesthetic flat closure and no reconstruction. This was not required - I could have had a lumpectomy and radiation, but I chose to go flat. Just wait 'til you see how much faster I'll be at hiking and cycling after... \n

About two weeks after that I will find out if the cancer has made its way into my lymph system, which will determine what kind of additional treatment I’ll need (for example, chemotherapy).\n

I was waiting to \"go public\" with this news until I could tell my mom in person, which I did earlier today. Telling my mom was as bad as, or maybe even worse than, getting the actual diagnosis. \n

Brent and I are coping well, and are leaning heavily on (1) our wonderful community of friends and family, and (2) inappropriate humor about my situation. I'm happy to speak openly about it if you have questions, and I'm especially delighted to welcome some inappropriate humor about it. My favorite so far is to talk about which \"alternative prostheses\" I will get afterwards. So far the front-runners are:\n
- Bicycle maintenance tools on retractable chains\n
- Beer taps (which would require my wearing a backpack with two separate beer bladders so that I could dispense two different kinds of beer)\n
Some of our other ideas are: laser pointers (to play with cats), tasers (to protect from robbers), movie projector, jack in the box. Please send more suggestions if you have any.\n

The next time you see me after May 1, you may notice something different about me (or… I mean… maybe you won’t). Hint: I did not get a haircut and I did not get new glasses. \n

I am going to go ahead and assume that you all feel bad for me. I am grateful for all of your support and concern, but please try to keep to positive messages, and inappropriate humor (about my situation). I will take every positive vibe you have to send, but sympathy just makes me feel worse, so please keep it light until further notice. Thank you. ?