Monthly Mom Messages\n
My mom and I touch base by e-mail every morning. I decided to \"mine\" these e-mails for notes that can provide a record of happenings, and state of mind. Here's June 2024:\n\n- June 1: Yesterday we were going to go to Drag Fest, but it’s an outdoor event and the wind here was gusting over 50km/hr so we went to play pool instead. We’ll go to Drag Fest today. \n
- June 2: Today we’re going to Brunch Theatre to see a performance of Grease. \n
- June 3: I’ve been pretty stressed the last couple days worrying about my oncology appointment tomorrow. Only one more day and then it’ll happen, which I guess is good. I’m just not looking forward to radiation and chemo. Sigh. \n
- June 4: At last the day of my oncology appointment has arrived. I’m dreading it but I know it’s for the best. Before that we’ll go for an Indian buffet lunch with some friends. That will be much more fun. :)\n
- June 5: I’m relieved to have the oncology consultation over with. I want to come to Red Deer once before I start chemo, which is next Friday. Does next Monday, Thursday or Friday work for you? If the weather’s good maybe we could have a picnic and walk at Bower Ponds. \n
- June 6: Brent and I are out camping at Pigeon Lake - one of our favorite places. \n
- June 7: Brent and I are leaving Pigeon Lake today to head back to Edmonton.\nSigh. We love Pigeon Lake.\n
- June 8: Today Brent and I are hosting a birthday party for our neighbor Shannon. It’ll be lots of fun. \n
- June 9: We had a great birthday party here yesterday for our neighbor, Shannon. Today we’re planning on going to a baseball game or a basketball game, depending on the weather. \n
- June 10: Today we’ll spend mostly doing stuff to prepare for when I start chemo this Friday. There’s lots to do. \n
- June 11: We’re coming to Red Deer tomorrow and we’re going to visit you and Lynne Schneider’s daughter, Natasha (in Sylvan). \n
- June 12: With the forecast being for rain and hard wind, I think we have to cancel coming to Red Deer today. Im sorry. I have to go for a CT scan early this morning, and then go get my seroma drained by my surgeon for hopefully the last time. \n\nThen we’re meeting a friend for lunch and then another friend for drinks. A very busy last day before I start chemo tomorrow. \n
- June 13: Well the dreaded day has arrived. I leave to go for chemotherapy at 7:00 this morning. \n\nI will message you around noon to let you know if I’m going to be home by 2:00 for a visit.\n
- June 14: I was beat yesterday after chemo, but then again, I had only gotten\none hour of sleep the night before. Thanks for postponing our visit.\nI should be good for 11:00 this morning. I got a good night sleep and\nthe chemo side effects haven't really started to hit me yet (other\nthan some diarrhea, but that doesn't stop me having a video visit).\n
- June 15: It’s my first day after chemo. I’ll message you when I can to let you know how I’m doing. Please don’t worry if you don’t hear back from me as quickly as usual. I’ve heard that you can get terrible fatigue from chemo and I don’t know what to expect. \n
- June 16: I still feel like the chemo side effects haven’t really kicked in to me. I konked out really early yesterday, but that’s not really uncommon. \n
- June 17: I'm feeling uhhhhh... off my game today. I had to get a shot on\nSaturday to boost my white blood cell production, and that shot gives\nyou bone aches as your marrow works harder to make white blood cells.\nWell, that started around 2AM and I haven't been able to get back to\nsleep since. I took a Tylenol, and it has helped completely, but I\nstill couldn't get back to sleep. That, plus the back pain from\nyesterday evening has me a little muddled. Tannis is supposed to come\nover this afternoon, but I'm not sure if I'm up to a visit today.\n
- June 18: Yesterday was a write off. I had nausea all day and hardly got up off the couch. My chemo infusions are every three weeks and I don’t know yet what to expect. So far today I feel somewhat better. Maybe I’ll get lucky and that will have been the worst of it for this session. \n
- June 19: Yesterday was another bad day with the chemo side effects, but not quite as bad as Monday. It’s been mostly nausea that is getting me. I expect today will be bad too but not as bad. Tannis was going to come over today but we’ve postponed until next week when I hope I’ll be feeling somewhat better. \n
- June 20: Yesterday was one of the worst days of my life. I spent 12 hours in the emergency room with an elevated heart rate from an infection, which can quickly become deadly when you’re on chemo because it knocks out your immune system. I didn’t have a fever at first so they didn’t know at first that it was an infection but then the fever showed up in the afternoon and they gave me antibiotics. \n\nMy poor left arm is a pin cushion. They gave me two separate IVs (they had taken the first one out, then decided I still needed one), four or five blood draws, eight or nine blood pressure checks. It was all on my left arm because, since the mastectomy, I can’t have any of that stuff on the right. \n\nToday I have to go in to the Cancer Hospital for more treatment, and then tomorrow again as well. \n
- June 21: I'm having another bad day. I'm into my third day with a resting\nheart rate well over 100. IT feels so uncomfortable and I'm dizzy and\nlight-headed. I may not be able to answer messages through the day.\n
- June 22: I’m starting my fourth day with a racing heart from my chemotherapy. My oncologist has agreed to lower my dose by 20% so hopefully that will help moving forward but for this round I just have to wait it out. It’s awful. I can’t even sleep because my heart is just pounding pounding pounding. \n
- June 23: I had another terrible day yesterday with the high heart rate and nausea. In the late afternoon I called the cancer hospital for help and they gave me a prescription for a new anti nausea medication. I took that and it seemed to help a little but then at 9:00 I vomited for the first time since my chemotherapy. Since I threw up, I’ve felt way better though. Hmmmmmm. \n\nI still feel pretty good this morning so here’s hoping that both problems are ready to go away now. \n
- June 24: I had a great morning yesterday because, I think, my anti-nausea med lasted a good long time. Unfortunately, I waited too long to take the next one so the rest of the day was a write off. I even had to cancel my visit with Sharon. Sigh. \nSo, I’m going to take the anti-nausea every 12 hours and see if that can keep me on my feet. This morning I feel pretty good so far. Wish me luck! \n
- June 25: I’m still on my antibiotics until tomorrow so I expect to have kind of a nauseating day today. I was supposed to go participate in a dietary study today but I postponed because of the nausea. \n
- June 26: I go in for a medical procedure this morning. I’m getting a ‘chemo port’ put in me so I don’t have to get new IVs every time I get chemotherapy. I think it’ll be an improvement. \n
- June 27: I slept on the couch last night, and might for a few more nights. We’ll see. When I got my chemo port put in yesterday they closed my incision with staples and last night it hurt for me to try to sleep laying down. In good news, my nausea is almost gone. Yay!!\n
- June 28: I guess I finally feel almost good! Yay! Today we’re going out to meet our friend, Sheila, for a coffee. I’m hoping that I’ll feel up to making a trip to Red Deer next week too. Do you have anything on your schedule for Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday or are you open for a visit if I can make it down?\n
- June 29: My nausea is pretty much gone now until next time. It feels great! We went for two walks and had a drink in the yard yesterday (that’s where my hair started falling out). \n
- June 30: I’m feeling good but we don’t have any plans for today. I think I’ll suggest a bike ride. I also think we’ll be able to make it down to Red Deer to see you tomorrow. It’ll have to be a shorter visit (60 or 90 minutes) because I get tired so easily and early.\n
Monthly Gratitude Posts:\n\n- June 15: I had my first chemotherapy yesterday. It was no fun, but it wasn't awful. She had to give me a new IV, so I kept the previous day's uncomfortable IV in for nothing. Sigh.\nAnyway, this post is about thanking you all for your support during this time. Support from you all is very important to me and makes me feel loved and much less anxious, and I'm so grateful.\nI also want to say a huge thank you for how adaptable you've all been when I've expressed HOW I would like to be supported. We're all figuring this stuff out together - me, as the \"person with cancer\", and you as the \"support team for your person with cancer\", and I just can't say enough how much I appreciate it that you're willing to grow and adapt with me as I go through this and learn how I want to be supported. \n
- June 16: Although I am dreading the onset of chemo side-effects (when they really start to come on), and I'm nervous about the future, I'm also very grateful for the life I've had, and hope to continue having.\nToday I'm feeling very grateful that, so far, the rain is keeping the fires in check and I can go outside. That is so important for me all the time, but especially when I'm trying to avoid exposure to people who are ill, I still have the opportunity to see people. Come see me if you can. Thanks to Sheila for coming for a walk with us yesterday.\n
- June 16: Another thing I'm grateful for today - YouTube videos for physio and exercise. My favorite of the day is this Tai Chi video. I've always thought Tai Chi was beautiful, and I wanted to try it, but it took cancer to get me started.\n
- June 17: I’m grateful that I’m not working, and I don’t have to work right now. I can’t imagine going through this and trying to keep up with work at the same time.\n
- June 18: Thanks to all of you sending the pebbles.\n
- June 19: I’m grateful that I’m not American today. My apologies to my American friends. \nI am on my way in to emerg with a high resting heart rate and my biggest concerns (besides my heart) are (1) how long of a wait time will there be and (2) how much will parking cost. I don’t have to give a second thought to bankrupting myself by seeking medical help.\n
- June 22: We went for a little walk today and I got to pet a dog\n
- June 23: I feel \"pre-chemo good\" this morning. I think when I take my antibiotic at 6:00 (in ten minutes) it will bring the nausea back, so I'm going to enjoy the heck out of this ten minutes...\n
- June 24: I’m grateful for Lois Hole PP with its Ruddy Ducks and Red-Winged Blackbirds\n
- June 25: I’m grateful for all of this rain and rain and rain that is keeping our air nice and clean this summer. I love breathing. It’s my favorite.\n
- June 26: I'm grateful for music, which always has the ability to surprise and delight me. Thanks to Phil B for this new (old) favorite: Reasons to be Cheerful, Part 3\n
- June 27: I’m grateful for all my weird friends. You know who you are. OK. All of you. It’s all of you. \n
- June 28: I’m grateful for Brent. I’m sure exactly zero of you will be surprised to hear that he’s an absolute prince. He’s taking such good care of me. I don’t know how I got this fortunate.\n
- June 29: I’m grateful for my brilliant, resilient and loving Mom\n
- June 30: I’m grateful that Brent ‘accidentally’ bought an ebike and I can ride it while I’m getting chemo.\n
- Second big hair loss day
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